Some of us watched while a person we knew systematically worked to dismantle someone else's plans as they were moving toward their dream job. (I wasn't the only one who took up for the dream job seeker. But to no avail.) When the person failed in getting what they wanted, (what did they want?!) they redoubled their efforts and succeeded in keeping the job seeker from being hired. (even though they had already officially been hired)
I struggled with this. A lot.
Partly because I wasn't sure the job seeker was the best fit either, but mostly because the other person's motivation and actions were so overblown. And they were getting away with it! I couldn't figure out why someone would go this far in their efforts to destroy not only someone else's plans for their life, but their entire reputation. To quote my friend Bridget, "That's just wrong."
And then the person who eventually ended up in the job turned into pretty much a perfect hire. Better than the original job seeker. Go figure.
Several other topsy-turvy things happened around this same time. Random events with no logical explanation. Things that were difficult to sort out, but all with good outcomes. What I had the most difficulty dealing with was my own emotional reaction to everything. I didn't settle down until I finally realized that these were just relational "pop quizzes" that didn't require my involvement, or even a response from me!
So, next time you find yourself thinking, "This shouldn't be happening," try waiting it out. Watch and trust. Do the next right thing. Go ahead and defend someone if you're called on to do that. And maybe you'll begin to learn what I, too, have been learning, which is. . .I don't have to impose my will on absolutely everything, after all.
And I'm learning that, sometimes, at least, I am called to:
willingly stay open, flawed, broken, and clueless, while I just let things come, let things be, let things alone. . .even if it's uncomfortable,
and relinquish agenda, control, pretense, old longings,
in order to be free, in order to live fully the present moment of my own life,
knowing that, impossible as it is, I must do it anyway because it is
what my soul demands.